Between These Sheets by Devon McCormack

Author:Devon McCormack [McCormack, Devon]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: UNKNOWN
Published: 2017-02-19T18:30:00+00:00

21

Reese

I was so fucking wrong when I thought I had to give up Jay that night.

It’s been a month since the anniversary of Caleb’s death, and I haven’t had an episode like that since. The usual day-to-day things still get to me. I can tell by the look on Jay’s face that he’s always uneasy whenever there’s a loud sound, but something about him being here has made it easier for me to manage. Feels as though at least someone is on standby in case I need help. I’m used to having to deal with it on my own. Be strong. Tough it out through shit. Therapy has obviously helped, but it’s not the same as having someone right here with me. Being around him quiets my mind. Not entirely—I know better than to expect that. The rumblings will always be there, and the episodes won’t go away, but it’s nice having an ally.

With our inventory audit completed, I don’t have that stress on my plate anymore. And Jay’s not only managed to keep his cool, but he’s become friendly with his co-workers. I like to think he’s chilled out because I’m as good for him as he is for me.

Jay spends most of his free time at my place. I haven’t even seen the house he lives in because he says it’s basically a frat boy’s room. But he’s started bringing clothes over. I made space for him in one of my drawers just two weeks ago—space I hope continues to grow as we spend more time together. We’ve made dinners together and watched a lot of movies. We both have a thing for over-the-top comedies like Zoolander, Anchorman, and The Other Woman. And he’s shown me a few stand-up specials from some of his favorite comedians, so we spend a lot of nights laughing together. Laughing helps scatter those distracting thoughts that come so frequently.

I file a few invoices away in my office, playing catch-up on some things I neglected while we were prepping for the audit. Finally, pieces of my world are falling back into place and moving in a positive direction. Not just with work, but with my life.

Jay and I drove to work separately from my house, and we’ll be driving right back once we’re finished. Then we’ll clean up and mess around. We’ve already agreed to make Chicken Parmesan tonight for dinner. And then the rest of the night will take us where it usually does, back into each other’s arms—back into the bliss that I’ve come to realize can exist for me once again, even if it is hindered slightly by the echoes from my past.

My phone vibrates.

It’s probably a naughty text from him, like ones we’ve exchanged a lot more these days. But it’s a call.

Melanie.

Oh, Melanie.

A knot twists in my gut. Every time she calls, my guilt consumes me.

She hasn’t tried to call since the day Caleb passed.

I don’t feel bad just because she’s trying to reach out to me. I feel bad because I know I shouldn’t be like this.

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